


Lonely

by JWade



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Gen, Tear Rating: 1/10
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-12
Updated: 2017-12-12
Packaged: 2019-02-14 00:27:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,729
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12995829
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JWade/pseuds/JWade
Summary: Sam is struck by a sudden fit of melancholy and Gabriel comes to cheer him up.





	Lonely

**Author's Note:**

> For now, this is just a one-shot. I might add more to it if I get an idea, but this is more of my writing therapy really. I've been feeling very like Sam in this one today, so Gabriel came to cheer us up lol.

Sam sat on the couch miserably and pulled his knees to his chest, resting his head on top of him. He had no idea where the sudden bout of melancholy had come from, but he had never felt so alone in his life. Dean had gone out on a hunt, helping an old hunter friend, but Sam just didn’t feel like going, and since Dean would have backup, he didn’t have to feel guilty about sitting this one out. Part of him wanted Dean to be here just so he wouldn’t be alone, but his brother would easily pick up on his mood and start getting worried and trying to figure out what was wrong with him. There was nothing wrong though and that just made it even worse. Besides, somehow he doubted Dean being here would make him feel any less alone. 

He felt the tears stinging his eyes as a fresh wave of self-hatred welled up in him. After all the battled he’d fought, all the monsters and demons, both literal and figurative, and he was sitting here struggling not to cry over nothing. It wouldn’t be so bad if there were some reason, no matter how small, even if it was just a stupid burnt piece of toast, but this was ridiculous. He grabbed his empty cup off the table and chucked it at the wall and the sound of shattering glass made him feel both better and worse at the same time, however that was possible. 

 

Gabriel had been about to dish out some just deserts to a very deserving asshole, when he felt a tugging on his grace that he couldn’t quite place. He figuratively poked at it for a bit, but when he couldn’t figure it out, he just shrugged it off and went back to what he was doing. He found himself rather frustrated when he couldn’t get the same enjoyment out of it that he usually did. He could barely summon more than a chuckle as the jerk tried to struggle to the surface of the Olympic sized pool of jello. Finally realizing that his heart wasn’t in it for some reason, he turned his attention back to that strange tugging on his grace, only keeping half an eye on the panicked man in the pool, just enough to make sure he didn’t die. 

All Gabriel could figure out was that it seemed like someone needed him. Whoever it was wasn’t praying though. It was more like some part of their being was subconsciously calling out to him, but it wasn’t quite strong enough for him to follow. Almost like it was muffled somehow. What could be causing it though? Who could it be? He was dimly aware of the cessation of struggles from the pool and absentmindedly checked to make sure he was still alive, and he was. Just unconscious. Gabriel snapped his fingers and returned the guy to his bed. It suddenly dawned on him what could be muffling it. If the person were under heavy wards, but then who…Sam! Gabriel quickly took wing, turning the jello back into water as he left. 

 

Gabriel had no idea where Sam could be, unable to sense him on a good day since Cassie’s little rib art job, much less if something had him warded up somewhere, so he headed to their little hidey hole to find a clue, stopping short when he found more than that. He furrowed his brow in confusion at the way Sam was sitting there looking so lost and his first thought was that something had happened to his brother, but no. That would have been much worse. He surely would have at the very least prayed to Gabriel to come fix it. When he took a step closer to Sam, his foot crunched in broken glass and Sam’s head snapped up to look at him. Sam’s only response was to sigh heavily and put his head back on his knees with a weary, “I’m not in the mood, Gabriel.”

“Not in the mood for what?” Gabriel asked much more gently than he normally would have, despite knowing the answer. 

“You,” Sam just said.

Gabriel just ignored him. The way his soul was calling out to him told him otherwise. Oh he was probably telling the truth about not being in the mood for the usual Gabriel persona, but he could drop that just this once. “What’s eating you?” he asked plopping on the couch next to him. 

“Nothing,” Sam said intentionally turning away. 

“Dean…?” Gabriel guessed. 

“Everything’s fine, Gabriel. Dean’s on a hunt,” Sam said impatiently. 

“Then why aren’t you with him?” Gabriel asked concerned. It wasn’t like Sam to let his brother go into danger without him. When Sam just shrugged in response, Gabriel got it. It wasn’t like he hadn’t been there more times than he could count. It was amazing that as wildly different as he and Sam were, they both fell prey to the same weaknesses. “Ah. One of those,” Gabriel said understandingly. 

Sam just snorted derisively. “What would you know,” he said bitterly. Like Gabriel, joy and fun personified, could ever know what it was like to be so lonely you just wanted to curl up and die. 

“More than you might think,” Gabriel said sadly and Sam finally turned to look at him, eyes narrowed as if he was trying to figure out whether he was making fun of him or not, but the emotion in Gabriel’s voice belying that thought. Gabriel took a deep breath and said, “This world definitely has its perks, believe me, but it’s very…dead,” Gabriel said, knowing that wasn’t the right word but unable to find a better one. “I mean like, it’s so easy to feel so cut off from everyone and everything and feel like you’re the only person in the whole world, like you’re almost drowning in it, and even when other people are around, they’re not really present, and you feel like you don’t matter at all…” Gabriel trailed off a bit. 

“You feel like that too?” Sam asked shocked. 

“Sometimes,” Gabriel said with a shrug. 

“How do you get over it?” Sam asked almost hopefully. As hopeful as he could manage to feel at the moment anyway. 

Gabriel shrugged. “It’s a little worse when you actually ARE alone,” he pointed out. “When so few people even know you’re alive, and the ones that do don’t really give a crap, but it always passes eventually.” He straightened himself up and shook off his own descending depression and focused back on Sam. That’s what he was here for. “But you’re not alone. And sometimes you just need someone to care and understand and remind you of that,” Gabriel said, considerably more cheerfully. 

Sam just stared blankly at Gabriel as he processed all that. Gabriel thought he really was alone, and when Sam thought about it, he couldn’t exactly dispute that. He’d lost heaven and none of them knew he was alive, and then the pagans, his new home and family turned on him too. In fact, he and Dean were probably the only two people who even knew Gabriel was alive and they had made no secret of the fact that they didn’t want him around and Sam suddenly felt a wave of guilt on top of everything else. He definitely hadn’t missed the hasty mask that Gabriel had pulled up either, and he found himself wondering how much of the Gabriel he knew was an act. Still… “You’re saying you care?” he asked skeptically. 

Gabriel rolled his eyes. “Did I or did I not sacrifice my life to get you out of that hotel? Did I have to come back here and let you know I was alive after I got resurrected? I could have just made for the hills, confident that everyone who knew about me was sure I was dead.”

“Why didn’t you?” Sam asked confused. Now that Gabriel mentioned it, that would have made more sense. 

“Because I knew that Cassie was working on getting back in heaven’s good books and I wanted you to have someone you could call on when you got into trouble,” Gabriel said as though it should have been obvious. 

“Well no one called you today, so why are you here?” Sam asked. 

“Because you did call me,” Gabriel told him. “Not consciously, I don’t think, and it took me a while to figure out what it was, but some part of you was calling for help, so I came.”

“Well you’ve reminded me of everything you needed to, so thanks,” Sam said sadly, turning back away, unsure what to make of this whole thing. 

“Nope. You’re not getting rid of me that easy, Samsquatch,” Gabriel said leaning back against the couch and snapping his fingers, creating a couple cartons of ice cream and some spoons. 

“I’m not some chick recovering from a breakup or pmsing, Gabriel,” Sam said tiredly. 

“Obviously,” Gabriel rolled his eyes again. “But you can’t deny they’ve got the right idea. Comfort food is comfort food, now eat,” he said grabbing one of the cartons and spoon. 

“I’m not getting out of it, am I?” Sam sighed. 

“Nope,” Gabriel said cheerfully, and Sam finally gave in and grabbed some ice cream. Gabriel snapped his fingers again and put some upbeat dance music on low in the background to try and lift the mood as he settled in for an afternoon of cheering up. 

By the time a few hours had passed, Sam had uncurled and was lazily draped over one end of the couch as Gabriel was the other and they were just talking and laughing the night away. Sam had lifted his leg to kick Gabriel after a rude comment more than once, and Gabriel was feeling pretty good about his reasons for coming here. Once Sam started yawning, Gabriel laughed and teased, “Guess Sammykins needs his beauty sleep.”

“At least it does some good in my case,” Sam teased back. 

“Oooh. Ouch. That hurt,” Gabriel said grabbing his chest theatrically and Sam laughed at him. “Night kiddo. Just shoot a prayer if you need anything.”

“Hey Gabriel,” Sam called before Gabriel could leave. “You can come by and hang out sometimes too.” Gabriel’s only response to that was a smile as he snapped his fingers.


End file.
